Monday, May 6, 2013


Two things happened this weekend that were super hot and damn if she just does these things because that's who she is - not because she's trying to find ways to make it hot for me.  I guess we're just very lucky to have found each other.

The first thing was one word, one simple comment, that had me buzzing for the rest of the day.  The background of this story is that I have a high pressure job and I've been trying to find alternative careers to make the same $$$, but being less stressed and busy.  We are both successful in our jobs.  She has been doing better and better and if things keep going well, there is an opportunity for her to go off on her own.  I had never mentioned it to her, but I had been thinking about her opening her own company and then I would do everything related to the business side, while she would be doing all the work to make the money.

As I was going out the door, there were some comments made by her that brought this subject up in my mind.  I quickly just started saying "actually, I had been thinking about this. . . ." and I proceeded to briefly explain the plan.  She was listening intently and ended up saying "so you'd be my bitch."  It caught me completely off guard, I wasn't sure I heard her correctly and I had kept talking a bit, and then paused.  I asked "what?" and she said it again.  I smiled, she smiled, I said "well, sure" and then we kept discussing the plan.

That little quip just got me all worked up and excited for a long time.  It really makes me want this whole thing to come to fruition more and more.  I know I'd love to go to work every day!

The second thing that happened was Sunday morning.  Long story short, after waking up, I went down on her and brought her off very nicely.  I was wearing thong panties and nothing else.  She began rubbing me through the panties.  Laying on my back, she leisurely kept rubbing - pressing under my balls and massaging.  Even hard, she was not stroking and I stayed in panties the entire time.  I eventually came in my panties.  It's not the way that I want it to happen all the time, but it was great that she did it that way!

Monday, April 29, 2013

Google Reader - And Update

Anyone else notice that their readership has gone down since Google discontinued Google Reader?  I know that I have not kept up on reading other people's blogs nearly as much as I used to since it was taken off line.  The Google Reader was so great - and now I'm not sure how to find something that is equal.

There hasn't been much to update, though I think we are at a good place now.  I don't push or suggest anything.  I take whatever she gives, whenever she gives it.  I do my own things to try to please her, but I know she doesn't want a relationship where I am her slave or doing everything for her.  Whenever I notice that she's busy or stressed I make sure to do something to help her out.  That can be anything from the chocolate on the pillow, or doing the errand or something else.

A good example is that recently we were sitting there and she noticed her toes were starting to chip and she said "look how bad my toes are, you're not keeping up on your job."  I ended up doing her toes, but here's the thing: had I not offered to do them later on, she would not have mentioned anything about it, nor would she have ordered me to do it.  Nor was there any "punishment" for letting them get bad.  And here's the other side of that coin - if I were to try to institute a rule where I work on her toes at least once a week, she wouldn't like that either.  She would not like the rigidity of the whole thing and more importantly, she would feel that I was doing too much for her, which in turn would make her feel guilty.

So I try my best to do the things I know will make her happy.  Would I want a more involved and/or intense WLM?  Yep.  But since she doesn't desire it, my desire for it is much less than it used to be.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

In other news.........people need air to breath.

At least the writer of this article recognized how silly it was that a study was done to determine this.  Next headline you'll read is that fish like the water.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

More Acceptance

Recently my wife was working at night.  She was not sure when she would be home.  After I put the kids to bed, I had been still feeling the pull of the light cross-dressing I engage in from time to time.  Either wearing some women's clothing or in this case, I decided to paint my toes.

I was upstairs on our bed painting them a nice pink color.  I was almost done with one foot when I heard her walk through the door.  Now, despite her knowledge that I do these things and the fact that my underwear drawer is half boxer, 1/4 thongs and 1/4 other panties which is fully within her knowledge, I always still get apprehensive.  I wonder if she's going to react negatively.  I immediately felt a pang of regret and wondered if I could hide the "evidence."  I immediately realized that would be futile because my toes were still wet and because the smell of polish is so pungent and unmistakable.

So, I sat and continued to polish as she walked in.  We made small talk for a bit and she wasn't even mentioning what I was doing.  I feared she was just going to ignore the so called elephant in the room, but as she was taking off her work clothes and changing, she said "you're doing them pink?  They look nice."  And that was that.  That simple comment made me feel very good.  We went about the rest of the night like we normally would.

Later that week, I was scheduled to go to a party that I thought was something like a jumpy house for the kids.  One that I would be required to be in the jumpy house, with my shoes off.  About 3-4 hours before the party, she reminded me about the party.  Without talking to her about the party, I ended up going to the bathroom to remove the polish.  I figured with my shoes off, I didn't want to take any chances with my socks getting pulled off or anything like that.  No need to embarrass myself or deal with kids in that manner.

Before the party started, she came down from the bathroom and asked why I took the polish off.  She had seen the pads with pink on it in the garbage can.  I explained my concern and she said "Oh, that's too bad.  It's not that kind of a party.  I wish you had asked me.  You had done such a good job and they looked great."  And that made me feel even better!  She is great.

Monday, April 1, 2013

Kink Ebbs and Flows

Shouldn't be a surprise, but there are days and weeks where I'm not the least bit kinky.  On the other hand, as time passes there is a slow build up and it becomes all consuming.  It's difficult to shake.  I'm sitting here, wearing a thong and pantyhose under my work clothes.

I think I've explained this before, but when I edge myself, I can feel contractions, there is a little bit of cum that I can feel deep inside and it is absolutely not an orgasm per-se because nothing ejaculates.  I can mentally stop from "cumming," though there are little contractions.  If I squeeze from the base, under my balls, I can get some of the cum out.  I've already done that twice today and consumed the cum that comes out.

What's interesting too is that there is a very strong desire to consume the little bit of cum that comes out and that does not go away.  Yet when I fully ejaculate and cum, the desire to consume immediately goes away.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Good Boy

In my office, with the flowers I bought for my wife for tonight.  A co-worker (young female) walks by my office and says "ooh, why did you buy flowers."  "Because I love my wife."  Her response: "Good boy."

If she only knew!

Monday, March 18, 2013

Heels and a Conversation

She went to an event last weekend, which required her to get dressed up.  She was going with her partner, another woman.  I began texting her about what she was going to wear, she responded that she was wearing a dress, so I asked which one.  She sent a picture and mentioned she was going to wear the "heels."  I made a point to tell her how good she looked in the dress and that "you're gonna turn a lot of heads tonight. Can't wait to see you."

The heels she referred to are very much like the ones in the picture below.
Diane Von Furstenberg - Renee

She NEVER wears them because she does not like high heels over 4 inches high.  I texted her back saying "I love it when you're wearing those heels - and taller than me."   She sent back a kiss.

I wasn't lying when I said I couldn't wait to see her that night.  Whenever she is wearing high heels, she  always turns heads, always gets compliments and always looks so damn hot.

When I finally got there, she was looking great and having a blast.  Fun fun night.  But what made the night a tad more interesting was that we ended up talking that night about same sex encounters.  She stated that she just simply has zero desire for doing anything with another woman.  Just nothing there for her.  I asked whether there was maybe a certain "type" that got her going more than others and she said no.  Women just didn't do it for her.  She could only see herself ever kissing another woman, but she did not even "want" to do that.  It was just that it's something that she wouldn't rule out.  She claimed that anything else sexual was not interesting to her at all.

The more revealing things to come out of the discussion, though were I admitted that I would absolutely be interested in same sex.  She asked point blank whether I'd want to give a blow job and without hesitation I stated yes.  I was nervous about that because I wondered if she would have a negative reaction.  It did not seem to bother her in the least.  I will never cheat on her (with a woman or a man), so if it were to ever happen, she'd either have to be there or give the okay to do it.  I think that she would be much more disturbed if I did it when she wasn't there, but I did not ask her the question.

The other interesting comment was that a woman recently tried to kiss her!  See my earlier post titled "Sunday" about the woman named Lilly.  Unbeknownst to me, earlier that night, Lilly asked if my wife if she could kiss her and she did briefly!  According to my wife, she said it was just a quick peck on the lips, but it was her belief that Lilly wanted a lot more.  My wife did not and did not even want the initial kiss, but they are good friends.  That gives that night a little more context to me!

Friday, March 15, 2013

Wife Led Marriage Going Mainstream

There is a great article.

The title of the article is "As Sheryl Sandberg says, success is about the man behind the woman."

Without her saying it, the woman in the article recounts how supportive her husband is.  This isn't exclusively a WLM thing, it's actually just being a good husband.  The author may not realize it, or she does and keeps the article vanilla, but her truer colors and thoughts come out at the end when she writes "I hope my son ends up like him [her husband]. He is growing up at a time when there are more women in college than men, and a woman could very well take over the White House by the time he starts grade school. It is not just the year or decade of the woman but quite possibly the century of the woman, and I hope he can be a champion for all of them."

That sounds to me very much like a WLM concept and ideal.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013


Long day yesterday and boy did a lot of things culminate in one night.

As part of a background, on Friday I bought a bunch of new pedicure materials.  I ordered some great clear makeup cases with locks on them with the intent of putting all of the pedicure tools in one (toe spreaders, buffers, nail edge cutter, cuticle clipper, cuticle pusher, cuticle cleaner, double edge cleaners and scrapers, files, etc.) and all of the polishes in the other.  I also bought some new cuticle remover (Blue Cross) and some nifty little single polish holder that is rubber, so you never have to worry about the bottle tipping over.  I used her account to order the materials, so I had to tell her to not be worried when she received an email from the company I bought them from.  She was happy about the presents.  She was happier that my plan was to organize, and of course that the purchases were for her benefit.

She also began telling me how slammed she was with work and other things that day.  She also texted me telling me her and her work partner needed to go to a work event on Friday, but afterward they wanted for the four of us (me, my wife, the partner and her husband) to go to dinner.

After that exchange, she also began explaining how a sudden meeting needed to take place and there were going to be problems with pick ups of the kids because she had to go to that meeting.  I offered to leave work early to pick up one of the kids from school for her.  This relieved a bunch of pressure from her because she would have been worried the entire time she was doing what she needed to do.  While she was there, I asked if she wanted me to make reservations for dinner.  She enthusiastically stated yes and told me to contact her partner.  After my discussions with the partner, I made the reservations per her request.

I then picked up the one kid and she was able to take her time and then go to the other school for a different event with another kid.  While there, I texted her if she had anything planned for dinner.  Her response: "I wish I did."

Nothing was defrosted or available, so I began rummaging through the house to figure out what to make.  I found some tomatoes, mushrooms, and fresh basil, so I knew I could do something.  I kept looking and found risotto.  With those ingredients, wine, chicken stock, Parmesan cheese, and garlic, I made a wonderful risotto.

If you've ever made risotto you know that you need to be stirring it constantly while slowly adding the stock having it absorbed and repeating until it's ready.  You need to immediately serve it once it's ready.  So I began to text her asking when she was going to be home so I could time it right.  At first, she said she'd be home in 10 minutes so my plan was to keep gently cooking it until she arrived.  At 15 minutes later, I asked her eta again and she said she was heading home.  That should be at most a 5 min trip, so I stopped cooking, had the table ready and the food served.  5 minutes passed and the kids were starving, so I let them eat.  5 more minutes passed and I didn't want the dinner to be bad for her, so I gently urged her to get home soon.

When she arrived home about 5 more minutes later, we kissed and sat down to dinner.  The kids were already on thirds, but the food was still in good shape.  As we were eating, we discussed my texts a bit and I explained how I wasn't trying to rush her, just that I wanted the dinner to be good for her.  Her response: "You're so cute, getting all upset about the dinner going bad."

Immediately after dinner, she received a phone call for work she had to take, so she went to our office and I cleaned the kitchen.  All of the dishes and cleaned the entire area.  When she came back down, I was finishing and she said "look at you doing all the cleaning.  Sorry that I just came home, ate, then had to take the call and did not help with cleaning up."  I explained I totally understood and was happy cooking and cleaning.  As I was finishing, she kissed me and said "My little househusband."  (which, unfortunately, I'm not.  I've told her most recently that I would love to quit my job,  stay home and take care of the kids and the house.  She knows it would be great too, because she knows I'd be in better shape and she'd always have great dinners ready for her.)

After all the kids were asleep, she looked for the open bottle of wine, but I explained that I had used it to cook.  So I went to the fridge and opened the bottle for her.  When doing so, I noticed one of our wine opener corkscrews was slightly bent, so I went to my shop and fixed it.  This was part of my plan - about a month ago she mentioned that she wanted to make a list of the things that needed to be fixed, but she never did.  Over the weekend I totally cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed our room and fixed two things in the house without being asked, which she was extremely happy about.  So when I fixed the corkscrew, her response was "wow, look at you.  You're on fire."

After pouring her a glass of wine, she said "Do you want to play Scrabble or something tonight?  Ah, forget it.  I'm totally fried.  Maybe I'll just let you do my toes."

Whenever she says  those things, I never know how to respond.  My feeling is one of joy, wherein I'd like to profusely express to her how I would love to do her toes, but I always get the feeling that when I respond in that manner, it makes her uncomfortable.  It's a battle in me.  I want to express to her how much I love it so she will want to do it more, but I realize that it will probably have the opposite effect.  Therefore, I simply said I would be up for doing her toes, but then noted that only a portion of my recent purchase had arrived.  Not everything had arrived.  She wanted to have them done, so upstairs we went.

Her toes were a dark color that is popular these days and it took a long time to remove all of the polish.  I asked her what she was going to wear on Friday night, but she wasn't sure.  It wasn't going to be a bold color though, so I went with a dark red, something I thought could go with any outfit really.  The entire time I was working, she was on her phone working, or looking at Facebook, and then reading on the Ipad.  We were also talking about other stuff.

I didn't do a great job - I think the color I used was old and it didn't flow on the nails that well.  It took a long time.  By the time I was done, it was passed our normal bed time.

After the nails dried, she was in the bathroom washing her face while I was cleaning up and she casually said  "Now you need to learn to do facials."  I immediately got a little excited, but I also not only have no idea how to do a facial, but I expressed to her that if I screwed up on her toes it was not big deal, but I didn't want to ever do something wrong when giving her a facial!  She agreed and immediately said she was only kidding.  I will have to figure out how to do a home facial.  It won't be nearly as good or as complicated as she could get done at a salon, but I should be able to come up with some quick routine that I can do every week.  If anyone has any suggestions on this, please let me know.

Later that night, we did end up making love.  Me on top and as we were doing it, she began spanking me.  And I mean spanking me hard.  The hardest she's ever smacked me.  Ooohhhhhhh, it felt so delicious.  I couldn't see, but I'm sure it was red.  It was so great and something completely unexpected.

With me still on top, I sat up and spread her legs so I could get to her clit.  While fucking her, I used my thumb and finger on her clit and brought her off.  I had been really holding back my orgasm, but once she came I was able to let loose after a few more thrusts.  We stayed with me inside her for a while, kissing and resting.

You all know that I have that typical male desire to eat the creampie before cumming, but then lose all desire immediately after cumming.  But this time, since we had spent some time with me still in her and time had passed, I started to get the feeling again.  I moved back up and began raising her legs back, pushing her butt up so that when I pulled out the cum wouldn't all fall out onto the bed.  I was about to pull out and dive in, but as I was doing that, she said "oh, no, don't even think about it.  I already had a great orgasm, I don't need anymore and it's late.  It's time to go to bed."  And with that, she moved out from under me, put her underwear on and went to the bathroom.  I was soooo close, but was fine with her decision.

As much as I sometimes think that we are not in a WLM because she does not specifically express it, does not use that term, does not implement it more, and even feels guilty or bad when I do all the cleaning or other work for her, the more I think about what happened last night, the more I know we are in her version of a WLM.  And I went to bed happy last night.  Very very happy.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Interesting Opportunity

My wife swallows.  She always has.  It's not something that ever forced on her, or even asked her to do.  It's something she's done from the very beginning and that has not ever stopped.

99% of the time we make love, it's in the bedroom.  There have been other places in the house, but with kids, unless you really wanted to scar them, you're best off doing it in the bed, with the door closed.  A couple of days ago, we ended up in the shower together and after I brought her off nicely with my tongue, she returned the favor.

What was interesting, however, was that as she was getting off of her knees, I noticed that she had spit out a bit of my cum.  I don't believe it was all of it, just the last parts, but I was 100% certain that some of it had been spit out.

Which now has me super curious.  I'm wondering if she's been swallowing when she didn't really like it.  Whether it was just a one time thing (in the morning, in the shower - maybe other circumstances).  Maybe my cum didn't taste good that morning.

I have to figure out a way to discuss this with her without offending her, making her feel self conscious or make her feel bad.  I'm even wondering if I can turn this around and gently suggest that if she ever feels the need to get rid of it, she only need to kiss me.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013


Well, not really.

During dinner, we talked about a project that she needed to have completed for Friday, which included the creation of a type of bench.  Immediately after dinner (an me cleaning the dishes), I went to the workshop and began what she needed.  I spent about a half hour in there, completing what I could (I need some more wood that I have to purchase tonight).  When I came back into the house, she commented on how nice it was that I immediately began on her project.

By the time I was done, however, it was dark out, but I still needed to go running.  It was cold by this time too, so when I was putting on my running gear, I noticed that I only had a black long sleeve running shirt.  My shorts were black too.  Running at night on the street wearing all black, with no reflective clothing, is a really bad idea.  My solution?  I went into her workout clothes drawer and found a running jacket type that was like the picture, only more blue than green, but that same type of bright color.  (BTW - that picture is from Lululemon, a place that she shops at endlessly!!!)

When I came downstairs and she saw me, she immediately said "what are you doing?!?!"  I explained the situation to her and even explained that it wasn't that girlie, no one would see me and I needed something not black.  Her response was "I know, but it's just that it's my jacket."  Upon leaving she said "Just don't stop to talk to anyone!"

I know she doesn't love it when I wear women's clothing.  I do NOT do it in front of her because I know she doesn't particularly like it.  It freaks her out a bit.  I also need to be careful because I believe that the cross-dressing thing might be a reason why she does not fully understand the WLM or submissive man concept.

There are many different parts of the spectrum, but a submissive man to a woman absolutely does not have to equal a effeminate man.  You can have the manliest male out there, who is also submissive to his woman.  I know she's more attracted to the alpha type males, so equating being submissive to her as being effeminate is not going to make her feel comfortable.

I made sure to take the jacket off as soon as I got home and then made the bed, folded her nighttime clothes placing them on the bed with a chocolate mint for her.

Monday, March 4, 2013

She is not Vocal

She is definitely an interesting person.  Good things happened to both of us on Friday.  So to celebrate a bit, I bought a couple of lobster tails, Mussels, Little Neck clams and Steamer clams, flowers, a bottle of champagne and made a hell of a dinner!  Grilled everything up and enjoyed the night.  She got her period that day, so she wasn't in the mood that night.  Very enjoyable night.

The next night, we went out to a function where we were dressed up.  She looked so hot in a great dress, heels and she did her makeup and hair differently.  I wasn't the only one who noticed, as many men and women complimented her that night.  It was a great event.  By the time we got home, it was rather late.  Despite being tired, once in bed, we began kissing and I eventually removed her panties.  She still had her tampon in, but that didn't stop me.  I brought her off and she returned the favor, so to speak.

What I find "funny" about the whole thing is that we're at a point where eating her out on her period doesn't even warrant a mention from her.  I mean, it's nothing surprising.  Sometimes I fear it's disinterest, but I really think it's more just she doesn't think of these things after they've happened.  Even when I've successfully eaten my creampie from her, she never mentions it again.  She never requests anything in the bedroom.  She never asks for anything in particular or anything.

Monday, February 25, 2013


Back from vacation, which was phenomenal, but not much happened WLM wise.  She was extremely happy and relaxed, so that was all good.  She got some alone time too.

The one funny WLM episode that did occur was us discussing an event we were going to do the next day.  We discussed it for about 10 minutes, evaluating timing, pros/cons etc., and then we needed to head back to the room.  She needed to go to the store, so she took off, while I took everyone back to the room.

When she came back, she said "I booked the trip.  We're going at 2:00, we're taking the "XXX" tour and we're all set, so no more discussions."  Reading typed words cannot give to you a sense of tone or how the two people in the conversation are reacting to each other.  As she said that, I was sitting in chair and she was behind me, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing my cheek.  My response to her was simply "sounds perfect."  And it was.

I know that my most recent posts have been positive ones.  I feel it necessary to express that I wish for us to be able to communicate more wherein I could explain my true deepest WLM feelings, she is 100% comfortable with that discussion, she more fully acknowledges our WLM and our WLM becomes more and more integrated into our daily lives.  An improvement in those areas I believe would enhance our lives and our WLM.  I think we are still moving towards that.  Sometimes it appears it has stalled, other times going strong and getting stronger.

Monday, February 11, 2013


It was an eventful weekend!  We went out on Saturday night to a friends' house for a Valentines Day party.  Just about 15 couples there, all good friends, all dancing and having a good time.  The host had great wine, liquor and beer (all high quality stuff - it was very cool) and since we all know each other and are good friends, it was relaxed fun.

Two things happened that night that were interesting.  I was talking to one woman (let's call her Lilly) who shares my passion for cooking.  Well, that and she's rather adventurous, and we've definitely talked women's fashion, make-up, and tastes in lingerie.  My wife did not drink because she was going to work the next day and was going to take the baby-sitter home that night too.

On the way saying good bye to everyone, we started talking to Lilly, who began sharing the contents of my previous discussion with her to my wife.  It was a playful conversation, but I was staying out of the conversation.  Lilly was telling my wife how great it must be to have someone interested in those things and my wife was agreeing.  At one point, though, Lilly said something like "oh, I could have so much fun with him" and without missing a beat, my wife responded with "you totally would!  You would love doing the make-up for him and modeling the lingerie.  And he'd probably paint your toes."  At which point, Lilly did a fake swoon.  They hugged and said goodbye and we left.

The whole conversation made me swoon!  So many things about it pushed my buttons, but also made me love it.  First, my wife effectively disclosed to someone else that I paint her toes.  That's nothing extreme, but I'm positive that the other men friends that I have there don't know I do that and if they did, I'd get much ribbing.  The fact that she was willing to disclose that information to someone else, in my presence, gave me a great submissive twinge.

Of course, I also liked the situation because of the topics being discussed and Lilly's reactions were little bit of an ego boost.  But the thing that I loved about the conversation was that my wife was not threatened in any way by Lilly!  At least from my vantage point, my wife appeared supremely confident that this was all talk, that I was hers, she knew I'd never do anything with Lilly and maybe my wife was showing off a little bit.

With that getting me going and being pretty buzzed, we went home and she took the baby sitter home.  When she returned, we were sitting on the couch and we began kissing.  Eventually, I got down on the ground, removed her jeans and underwear and began eating her out.  Instead of bringing her off, I kept bringing her to the brink, stopping, but then slowly bringing her back to the brink and repeating.  It got her extremely revved up to the point where she pushed me down the ground, pulled my pants off and mounted me.  It didn't take long for her or for me to finish.

All of that was great --------------- and then she did something that I wish turned out differently for me.  As I was still on the ground, she stood up, grabbed her panties and pushed them up against her pussy.  I asked what she was doing and she said she was making sure she didn't leak out.  She then grabbed her jeans and went up stairs.

Now, for people who've read previous posts, I'm the typical guy who is supremely turned on by the idea of creampie eating, but as soon as I cum, the desire goes away.  There are soooooooooooo many times that I've decided to eat it on my own and as soon as I come, I can make myself do it.  I asked her one time to sit on my face after I came in her, no matter what I did, and she did it.  She has never done that on her own though.

So, the thing is, unbeknownst to her, she presented a perfect opportunity to me to take care of her and I did nothing.  Now, if she had asked me, I would have done it - of course.  While she is multi-orgasmic, she does need a little down time too, so that's partly the issue.  It's not like at the time she had the panties there she was horny and would have loved for me to do it either.  While I wish I took advantage of the situation, the good thing is that in her eyes, there was nothing wrong with what I did.

The good things over the weekend weren't over though.  The next morning, I got up early and went downstairs to make coffee.  I dealt with the kids while she was upstairs doing a bit of work.  I brought the coffee up and while she had to work later the afternoon, the morning was open.  She got a movie that we rented that she had tried watching earlier in the week but ended up falling asleep.  She put the movie on and I went downstairs.  I decided to make her breakfast and went about making everything for her, and feeding the kids.  During the process, I went up there with the coffee pot and filled her cup.

It took awhile, but eventually I had made everything (a breakfast I know she loves), and just walked up and gave her the food.  Here eyes got huge, profusely thanked me and said how great it was, not only for the food, but being able to watch the movie alone without interruption.

I was very happy to do all of that for her.

Friday, February 8, 2013


In my continued efforts in providing more service, I have stepped up making the bed, folding her pajamas nicely on the bed and added some chocolates this last time.  She loved that.

But that's not the coup.  No, the coup was I worked extra hard at work to complete various projects to open up some unexpected vacation time.  So instead of traditional valentines day presents, I've surprised her with a trip/vacation she's been dying to do for a long time.

I had to tell her earlier than V-Day because she needs to plan for her work and other things, but she was very pleased.

She is also aware that I have been making many efforts to find a new job, which pleases her.  I still need to be better at doing other things to make her happy.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Wife Led Marriage

Last night, my wife had to go do something that was unpleasant, but something she had to do.  (I'm being intentionally vague so as to protect identities.)  Concurrently, she was on track to get her period today, so yesterday she had bad cramps and did not feel well.

Hearing that she was suffering from cramps, on the way home I picked up fresh fruit and dark chocolate and prepared it while she was out.  This morning, before I left for work, I made the coffee, made a fruit plate and arranged several pieces of chocolate on a plate and put it by her bedside.  She was very pleased this morning!

After thanking me through email, I wrote back "you're welcome.  I love doing those things for you.  Glad it made you happy.  Still looking for additional things to do for you."

Her response was decidedly WLM in my humble opinion.  Her response (edited to remove the non-related stuff) was: "...As for thinking of other things to do for me...  I really want for you to be able to quit your job and do something else you like.  I love that you spend time thinking of me and doing things for me but I'd rather you spend the time at this point focusing on getting a new job.  Not forever :-) just for a month or two.  My happiness will increase exponentially by seeing you walk out the door and go to a job that makes you happy, so that you can spend more time with me and the family."

If there is no humiliation, demand, or order, how can it be a WLM?  I have heard the terms Wife Led Marriage, Loving Female Authority or Female Led Relationship before and they all mean the same thing to me.  Reading her answer carefully, it is a combination of all three of those short hand monikers for our relationship.

She's expressing the gratitude, the love, but also telling me what to do to make her happy.  It all comes down to "what does she want?"  What does she want?  She wants the chocolate, she wants the toes painted, she wants those things, but she wants the other things too and is telling me it's going to make her happy.  So what am I going to do?  I'm not going to stop doing the nails, flowers or any of those things, but I'm also going to focus on the new job angle too.

What is still "funny" to me is that she does not realize that this is a WLM.  She doesn't focus on it at all.  She just does.  She is just who she is.  And I love her for it.

There have been a lot of posts that have been non-sexual.  It's not to say that we aren't having sex.  We are. There has been nothing kinky, no tease and denial, no chastity belts etc.  None of those things that I've tried to introduce in the past have stuck and I've stopped suggesting them.  Again, what's funny is that twice in the last month, after getting into bed and me bringing her off either one or two times with my tongue and/or fingers, she's said "now I'm too tired to reciprocate" and we've just gone to bed with me not having an orgasm.

In both of those times, I'm 100% convinced she's not doing it on purpose, with a conscious decision to deny me an orgasm.  She just felt too tired and wanted to go to bed.  So what is that?  It's a WLM!!!!!!  It's exactly how she wants to be!  She wanted to go to bed, so she did.  Again, I was perfectly happy to have that happen.

Do I crave more?  Yes.  Would I have wished for the chastity belt?  Would I have wished for more playfulness?  More teasing?  Absolutely.   Am I upset or sad that it did not happen?  Nope.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Not Everyone is Enlightened.

Look, I'm not going to stump for the idea that the world should be all WLM or FLR.  It makes perfect sense that men and women don't want it.  If that is what you and your wife or girlfriend want, then great!

But stories like this serve as a reminder that some people will react downright negatively if you so much as get an inkling away from the patriarchal "norm."  Poor guy in this story wanted to change his last name to his new wife's last name and the state of Florida went berserk.

I do love the guy's attorney's quote: "Apparently the state of Florida clings to the out-dated notion that treats women as an extension of a man," said Lazaro's lawyer, Spencer Kuvin, with Cohen & Kuvin in West Palm Beach. 

Sadly, though, the article reveals that only 9 states enable a man to change his name upon marriage: California, New York, Hawaii, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Oregon, Iowa, Georgia and North Dakota.

Wow.  It is 2013 right?  Why in the world would it matter to anyone if a man wanted to take his wife's name upon marriage?  Crazy stupid.  But that's just my opinion.

Thursday, January 24, 2013


More "boring", undeniably non-kinky stuff, but stuff she's loving more and more.

I did her toes on Tuesday night.  Just completely causal, both of us on the bed, watching tv, while I worked on making them nice.  They came out okay.  Not as good as I hoped.  The polish actually looked nice, but what I have not mastered yet is all of the other work that needs to be done to the toes to get them looking ready for the polish.  I did cut the nails in an effort to make them nice and round and smooth, but they were different lengths.  One pinkie toe nail was much smaller than the other one.  The other thing I didn't do well was pay attention to the cuticles.  I didn't remove any, lotion it or anything else.  So while the polish looked nice, with no smudges or missteps, the toes could have been better.

But, she mentioned many times on Wednesday that she was very happy with her toes and was happy whenever she saw them.  So that was great.

While at work yesterday, I decided to get a single rose for her and the plan was to, either while she was still sleeping (many times, she's still asleep before I leave for work) I would put the rose on the bed with a little love note.  I had the rose and the note ready and she was actually up and working by the time I left this a.m. While she was down stairs working, I quickly made the bed, folded her pajamas, and put the note and flower on the bed in the middle.

Got a text from her saying how much she loved it and it made her week!  In an effort to be playful, I teased her a bit, texting back "what, no more comments about making the bed and the pajamas?  Getting stale already?"  Her response was "NO!  Don't stop doing that.  I love it."

I'm going to start integrating making the coffee in the morning for her.  I've tried to do that in the past, but she's kind of persnickety on how she likes her coffee.  I need to figure out how to make it the same way she likes it.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Ahhhhh, that wonderful feeling

It is the little things.  I've mentioned the toenails before and how it isn't that important to her.  She likes it, but nothing special.  She had a pedicure from a salon a long long time ago and about 2 weeks ago it was wearing off.  She made a comment about how I'd have to do her toes for her soon.  It was a passing comment and nothing further was said about it.

Two days ago, she mentioned that I'd have to do her toes again.  I had made up my mind when she told me, that I would I would do her toes the first chance I got.  We couldn't do it that night, nor could we do it last night.  She did say last night "I took the polish off my toes today, but you're going to have to cut them and paint them tomorrow.  I'm not going to ask, you're just going to do it."  It was said in her happy, matter of fact, normal, voice.  I was feeling great, because without probably fully understanding everything, I do feel like she IS understanding the relationship, the power, our roles, and what makes us both happy.

It got even better though.  I've continued my habit of, as soon as I arrive home, making the bed and folding her pajamas on her side of the bed.  Last night, as we were getting in bed, she said that while she knows she's said it before, having the bed made and her pajamas folded is just such a nice thing, it makes her so happy, that she can't imagine it not happening in the future.  She said she hopes it never ends.  I told her that her reaction is the exact reason I do it for her.

It's getting better and better.  And now I've got to start thinking of more ways to keep this up for her.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013


I have been gone for way too long.  My wife and I are still very much in love.  But I'm sure more people (if they still exist) are interested in the WLM aspect, as opposed to whether we are still in "love."

First, there is an explanation for why I've been absent from the blog.  That explanation is that I found that I was spending wayyyyyyyyyy too much time thinking about the WLM concept, which was making me focus on the male centric, pornographic, fantasy desires as opposed to focusing on her.  My thoughts were being clouded by the desire for the CB-6000, creampie eating, being spanked etc., instead of focusing on our actual, real relationship.

I began coming home from work so desirous for a hardcore WLM that when she did not perform anything in  the sexual arena, from her own desire, I became sullen and resentful.  Most of the time, this was not communicated to her, but that almost made it worse.  If there are any actual women out there who are reading this blog because they are searching for information on the subject after their husbands/boyfriends expressed an interest, they are probably nodding their heads knowingly.

What I realized was that I needed to focus more on just us having fun together and taking the WLM aspect in stride, whenever it did occur.  I had tried to get her interested in "demanding" a massage from me, making me pamper her by painting her toenails or something similar.  I have to realize, however, that while I may enjoy those things, it is obviously not important to her.  If it's not important to her, then why should I continually force the subject?  It seemed as if when I did the toenails, she would enjoy it in the moment, but then I was always left to wonder whether she was enjoying it solely because she knew I enjoyed it?!??!  It was a vicious circle.

Instead, I realized that I should take the opportunities whenever they arose.  I offer to do things for her and/or just do things I know she will like.  For example - many times when I come home from work, her pajamas are on the tub in the master bathroom.  Many times, I would leave them there, or put them in the hamper.  Since she wears them multiple nights in a row, I now take them and fold them nicely and put them on bed.  She has certainly noticed and commented several times on how nice that is (she even said it's like being at a really nice restaurant when you get up to go to the bathroom and you come back and your napkin is nicely folded again on your chair.)

My point is that my focus now is on her and specifically things I know she likes.  I fix everything in the house.    I have made sure to do the home improvements I know she wants, but has not asked me to do.  That's the thing.  She doesn't ask or demand.  Nor does she want to.  She would never feel comfortable demanding that I paint her nails.

That doesn't mean we aren't in a WLM.  I'm much more focused on her and her needs and wants.  She truly appreciates everything.  It's actually kind of funny, because from her point of view, if I ever do approach her on a more "traditional" WLM, I think her answer would be "I have it great right now.  Why should I change it?  The only thing I'd end up doing more of is sexual things you like and I don't particularly enjoy."

She doesn't want to feed me my own cum.  She doesn't like dildos or vibrators.  She enjoys G spot orgasms (though I can't get her to squirt), so I recently purchased a G-Spot vibrator.  I used it on her a couple of nights ago and she was not impressed.  She stated that she would much rather have me inside her, instead of some plastic.  She's said that before.  So I won't be using the vibrator on her anymore.  It also means that she'll never want to put me in chastity cage and make me fuck her with a strap-on.

Don't get me wrong.  I wish we were more simpatico on those sexual activities.  It is somewhat disappointing that she is not interested.  On the other hand, I do get great satisfaction, and so does she, when I do things that help her and make her happy.  Making coffee for her in the a.m. so that she has it ready before she leaves.  Emailing dinner ideas and recipes.  Going shopping for her.  Doing the dishes after work.  Do P90X with her because that's what she wants to do.

Probably not the most interesting post but I think I'm living more of a WLM now than I had previously thought, despite the lack of femdom sexual activity.  And I believe that we are both happy.