Wednesday, February 24, 2010


Listening to the USA v. Switzerland hockey game. Announcer just said: "You know, they're not allowing a lot of penetration, and that can be frustrating."

I know it's juvenile, but I had to chuckle at that!

Tuesday, February 23, 2010


Going into this whole attempt to introduce my wife to Femdom, I knew several things that were stacked against me.

1. I am much more open minded.
2. I am much more adventerous.
3. I have had a lifetime of experimentation and fantasies.

I have previously tried different things to "spice things up" in the bedroom. I once dropped her off at a sex shop (an upscale one, in a nice area - not your stereotypical seedy XXX shop) and sent her in there to buy whatever she wanted. I've suggested, and then, videotaped us. I have been the one to always suggest any type of bondage. It was all very basic - just tying her to the bed etc.

So I shouldn't be too surprised when she has not taken to any of this, unless it is at my urging. I really don't wish to keep being the one to bring it up and while many would think that is because I don't want to "top from the bottom" or some other similar reason it's because I've realized that what I'm looking for doesn't exist when I'm always the one to introduce Femdom.

What is that? What doesn't exist, you ask?

It's actually two things, but very closely connected. It's the extreme closeness felt with someone when she's the dom and I'm the sub and the psychological effect it has on me, and hopefully her.

I know that she's trying these things at my behest, but that, despite her prostestations to the contrary, I don't believe she truly enjoys them. I'll put it this way: she always says she's enjoying herself and likes being in control. Her action completely betray those statements. If she truly enjoyed being in control, why would she never ever take control, unless I initiate the control.

Since I made dinner for her in early January, I have not initiated any sexual activity or any Femdom activities. I have, on the other hand, been a very loving and caring husband. It isn't as if I've been ignoring her, not talking to her, not doing my share around the house, not making dinner, not taking care of the kids or anything like that. Just haven't initiated anything. And yet, during that same time, she has not initiated anything remotely sexual or Femdom.

Back on New Years, we did have a dicussion about my being submissive. Not a complete 100% disclosure, but a discussion about submissiveness and how it would be between us. She stated that the whole submissive thing is fine with her. She had reservations about a lot of things, including a feeling of "guilt." She felt "guilty" about inflicting punishment, or pain, or denying orgasms, because it seemed to her like it's wrong and mean.

Obviously, I explained that that is the point! It's not mean, because I enjoy it. We discussed it more about being a Femdom. I tried explaining that in many ways, we already live in a WLM! She already does many WLM things, such as planning parties without even asking me first, being in charge of the finances, asking me to get her drinks etc. I simply suggested that she expand on that.

I explained that while she doesn't have to have sex every night, she can always just tease me. Meaning, a small comment here or there. Pat on the cock and tell me it's too bad it can't cum etc. Flirt with me. Anything.

And yet, that's the problem. Nothing. So, if she really did like it, really did enjoy it, she would initiate it. But even if she did, it is completely lacking in passion. I don't ever want to feel as if I'm dragging her kicking and screaming into anything. My impression is that she's just doing it because it's something I want, and I ask, so she does it.

If that were the case, then some ask "what's wrong with that." I do not want to make this a one sided thing. I truly thought that she would embrace it more and that it would bring us closer as a couple. And there you have it - I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Friday Photos

I think you can easily figure out the theme. Have a great weekend, and hopefully your weekend includes an event like these photos.

Sunday, February 14, 2010


Just saw this photo from and had to repost it.

Monday, February 8, 2010


Even though we are not currently engaging in anything (let alone Femdom), it doesn't stop me from thinking about things in my down time. I thought I'd give my position on creampies - specifically me eating them.

Creampies, to me, are very complex. Not only my own, personal issues with it, but also the role it has played between my wife and I.

On a personal level, I love the fantasy of it. I do suffer, however, from a very common issue - that is, as soon as I cum, I lose desire to eat her out! It may sound weird, but I've read many other people's thoughts on the issue and the loss of desire is very real and common. Thinking about eating it, wanting to eat it, seeing photos of it, etc., are all very exciting. Then, boom, as soon as the orgasm is done, all desire is gone.

It's odd, and a little frustrating, to have this type of deep desire to do it, but then getting thwarted, by yourself, by your own orgasm!

That's not to say I haven't done it. I have. But that's where more odd complications come in. My experiences with my wife have been sorta scattered.

Some of the times in which I've done it with my wife, I did it completely on my own. Trying to fulfill my own fantasies. Meaning, prior to engaging in sex with her, I made up my own mind that after cumming in her, I'd immediately eat her out to an orgasm. And what I mean by "did it completely on my own" is that I never said anything to her before eating her out. We in the missionary position and when I came, I sorta just laid on her for a little bit. I then went on down and started eating her out. I know that she didn't really realize what I was going to do as I was kissing my way down there. Because once I began doing it, she apparently recognized what was really occurring, because she stated "what are you doing?" She said it in a mixture of shock and surprise, but also of pleasure. She did absolutely nothing to stop me and did have a thundering orgasm. Of course, she never asked me about it later, or discussed what happened.

I've also repeated that same scenario, but she's never even said anything like "What are you doing." She never acknowledged what was happening. I'm not sure if, during those times, she realized what was going on and just didn't say anything about it, or whether she did.

Once, when we were much much younger, I came on her stomach and she told me to lick it off. I'm sad to say that at that time I was less in tune with, and willing to embrace, my submissive side and my initial macho male response was "no." She did not ask me further. I remember thinking at the time that if she told me again, or pressured me further, I would do it, but she left it alone. She never asked me or ordered me to do it again.

I often wonder what would have happened if back then, which was about 15 years ago, had I immediately obeyed her, how different, if at all, our lives would have been.

Very recently, in the last year, she was riding me cowgirl and came. She lay on my chest, and we talked for some time and began kissing me. She did nothing overt and she never said anything, but it was rather clear to me by her actions that she wanted another orgasm. I'm kind of passed the days when I could get hard again within 15 minutes after the initial cum, other than rare occasions. So I rolled her over and ate her to another orgasm.

It's very interesting because she never said a word about it. I don't even know if she realized I had cum inside her when she was riding me cowgirl. I don't know if she did everything on purpose or not. I mean, did she make a conscious decision in her head that "he came in me, but I don't care, I need another orgasm." Did she just not really think and put 2 and 2 together? Did she do it on purpose because it turned her on? She never said a word about it then, or since. I never brought it up to her.

When I first approached her about the Game back in October, I gave to her the list of rules and objectives. Before she agreed to do the Game, she read the entire list, and there were many things that she was reticent to do. I think part of that was the sheer number of things. It was a little too much too fast. Anyway, three of the objectives in extreme included me eating my own cum. She reacted relatively negative to those. She did not seem to want to do those.

I found her immediate negative reaction somewhat curious because, as I have said, we have done that in the past and she even told me to do it at least once.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010


Yep. I'm in it. February and March are going to be painful - not in the "living a wonderful femdom relationship" painful - but a "work is going to kill me" painful way. Oh well. Such is life.

In the meantime, enjoy these photos:

This last photo is just so great!! Love the way she is holding him, love him being locked, and love the leg over his, showing the key. WOW!!!!!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010


Unfortunately, this is not going to be an interesting post.

Things are very much on a hiatus, and I'm not sure when they will change. Essentially, I got called into a major project at work that was supposed to end the last weekend in January. Good news is that I did very well in the project.......and now I'm supposed to continue on with it. Which means that I'm working tons of hours and even on the weekends.

With the kids and her job, we barely even see each other, let alone engage in anything.

We'll see.