Found this image on http://themarrieddomme.blogspot.com/ (a great blog.)
This photo represents where I would love for my relationship to be with my wife. We are not at a point where she will use a strap-on on me, nor have I even broached the subject of a chastity device. While we are engaging in chastity right now, it's a self-imposed and "trust" version. She simply trusts that I do not have an orgasm outside of her presence.
Of course, I would love to submit to her locking my cock in a chastity device. The symbolism of her engaging in the act of placing the device on, taking the key, and wearing the key as a daily reminder would powerful to me, and hopefully powerful to her. I would be surprised if she ever a) agreed to do it; and b) enjoyed it. One issue is that it is pushing her out of her element and the other issue is the "found out" thing. She would be deathly afraid that the kids would see, or that someone would know. These don't bother me as much - I couldn't care less what others think or know. She is different.
And the strap-on is a "no go" right now. She states that she does not enjoy anal sex and thinks it's gross. I also believe, though she claims otherwise, that she associates a strap-on to a male is a homosexual thing.
It's a long process, but I'm hoping that I can disprove the age old maxim of "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." I'm hoping that if I keep exposing her to new things, gradually increasing her awareness and showing her how much it is something she would enjoy, that she will gradually become more actively engaged.