In my office, with the flowers I bought for my wife for tonight. A co-worker (young female) walks by my office and says "ooh, why did you buy flowers." "Because I love my wife." Her response: "Good boy."
If she only knew!
Showing posts with label WLM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label WLM. Show all posts
Friday, March 22, 2013
Friday, March 15, 2013
Wife Led Marriage Going Mainstream
There is a great article.
http://www.mercurynews.com/bay-area-living/ci_22781977/sheryl-sandberg-says-success-is-about-man-behind
The title of the article is "As Sheryl Sandberg says, success is about the man behind the woman."
Without her saying it, the woman in the article recounts how supportive her husband is. This isn't exclusively a WLM thing, it's actually just being a good husband. The author may not realize it, or she does and keeps the article vanilla, but her truer colors and thoughts come out at the end when she writes "I hope my son ends up like him [her husband]. He is growing up at a time when there are more women in college than men, and a woman could very well take over the White House by the time he starts grade school. It is not just the year or decade of the woman but quite possibly the century of the woman, and I hope he can be a champion for all of them."
That sounds to me very much like a WLM concept and ideal.
http://www.mercurynews.com/bay-area-living/ci_22781977/sheryl-sandberg-says-success-is-about-man-behind
The title of the article is "As Sheryl Sandberg says, success is about the man behind the woman."
Without her saying it, the woman in the article recounts how supportive her husband is. This isn't exclusively a WLM thing, it's actually just being a good husband. The author may not realize it, or she does and keeps the article vanilla, but her truer colors and thoughts come out at the end when she writes "I hope my son ends up like him [her husband]. He is growing up at a time when there are more women in college than men, and a woman could very well take over the White House by the time he starts grade school. It is not just the year or decade of the woman but quite possibly the century of the woman, and I hope he can be a champion for all of them."
That sounds to me very much like a WLM concept and ideal.
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Pedicure
Long day yesterday and boy did a lot of things culminate in one night.
As part of a background, on Friday I bought a bunch of new pedicure materials. I ordered some great clear makeup cases with locks on them with the intent of putting all of the pedicure tools in one (toe spreaders, buffers, nail edge cutter, cuticle clipper, cuticle pusher, cuticle cleaner, double edge cleaners and scrapers, files, etc.) and all of the polishes in the other. I also bought some new cuticle remover (Blue Cross) and some nifty little single polish holder that is rubber, so you never have to worry about the bottle tipping over. I used her account to order the materials, so I had to tell her to not be worried when she received an email from the company I bought them from. She was happy about the presents. She was happier that my plan was to organize, and of course that the purchases were for her benefit.
She also began telling me how slammed she was with work and other things that day. She also texted me telling me her and her work partner needed to go to a work event on Friday, but afterward they wanted for the four of us (me, my wife, the partner and her husband) to go to dinner.
After that exchange, she also began explaining how a sudden meeting needed to take place and there were going to be problems with pick ups of the kids because she had to go to that meeting. I offered to leave work early to pick up one of the kids from school for her. This relieved a bunch of pressure from her because she would have been worried the entire time she was doing what she needed to do. While she was there, I asked if she wanted me to make reservations for dinner. She enthusiastically stated yes and told me to contact her partner. After my discussions with the partner, I made the reservations per her request.
I then picked up the one kid and she was able to take her time and then go to the other school for a different event with another kid. While there, I texted her if she had anything planned for dinner. Her response: "I wish I did."
Nothing was defrosted or available, so I began rummaging through the house to figure out what to make. I found some tomatoes, mushrooms, and fresh basil, so I knew I could do something. I kept looking and found risotto. With those ingredients, wine, chicken stock, Parmesan cheese, and garlic, I made a wonderful risotto.
If you've ever made risotto you know that you need to be stirring it constantly while slowly adding the stock having it absorbed and repeating until it's ready. You need to immediately serve it once it's ready. So I began to text her asking when she was going to be home so I could time it right. At first, she said she'd be home in 10 minutes so my plan was to keep gently cooking it until she arrived. At 15 minutes later, I asked her eta again and she said she was heading home. That should be at most a 5 min trip, so I stopped cooking, had the table ready and the food served. 5 minutes passed and the kids were starving, so I let them eat. 5 more minutes passed and I didn't want the dinner to be bad for her, so I gently urged her to get home soon.
When she arrived home about 5 more minutes later, we kissed and sat down to dinner. The kids were already on thirds, but the food was still in good shape. As we were eating, we discussed my texts a bit and I explained how I wasn't trying to rush her, just that I wanted the dinner to be good for her. Her response: "You're so cute, getting all upset about the dinner going bad."
Immediately after dinner, she received a phone call for work she had to take, so she went to our office and I cleaned the kitchen. All of the dishes and cleaned the entire area. When she came back down, I was finishing and she said "look at you doing all the cleaning. Sorry that I just came home, ate, then had to take the call and did not help with cleaning up." I explained I totally understood and was happy cooking and cleaning. As I was finishing, she kissed me and said "My little househusband." (which, unfortunately, I'm not. I've told her most recently that I would love to quit my job, stay home and take care of the kids and the house. She knows it would be great too, because she knows I'd be in better shape and she'd always have great dinners ready for her.)
After all the kids were asleep, she looked for the open bottle of wine, but I explained that I had used it to cook. So I went to the fridge and opened the bottle for her. When doing so, I noticed one of our wine opener corkscrews was slightly bent, so I went to my shop and fixed it. This was part of my plan - about a month ago she mentioned that she wanted to make a list of the things that needed to be fixed, but she never did. Over the weekend I totally cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed our room and fixed two things in the house without being asked, which she was extremely happy about. So when I fixed the corkscrew, her response was "wow, look at you. You're on fire."
After pouring her a glass of wine, she said "Do you want to play Scrabble or something tonight? Ah, forget it. I'm totally fried. Maybe I'll just let you do my toes."
Whenever she says those things, I never know how to respond. My feeling is one of joy, wherein I'd like to profusely express to her how I would love to do her toes, but I always get the feeling that when I respond in that manner, it makes her uncomfortable. It's a battle in me. I want to express to her how much I love it so she will want to do it more, but I realize that it will probably have the opposite effect. Therefore, I simply said I would be up for doing her toes, but then noted that only a portion of my recent purchase had arrived. Not everything had arrived. She wanted to have them done, so upstairs we went.
Her toes were a dark color that is popular these days and it took a long time to remove all of the polish. I asked her what she was going to wear on Friday night, but she wasn't sure. It wasn't going to be a bold color though, so I went with a dark red, something I thought could go with any outfit really. The entire time I was working, she was on her phone working, or looking at Facebook, and then reading on the Ipad. We were also talking about other stuff.
I didn't do a great job - I think the color I used was old and it didn't flow on the nails that well. It took a long time. By the time I was done, it was passed our normal bed time.
After the nails dried, she was in the bathroom washing her face while I was cleaning up and she casually said "Now you need to learn to do facials." I immediately got a little excited, but I also not only have no idea how to do a facial, but I expressed to her that if I screwed up on her toes it was not big deal, but I didn't want to ever do something wrong when giving her a facial! She agreed and immediately said she was only kidding. I will have to figure out how to do a home facial. It won't be nearly as good or as complicated as she could get done at a salon, but I should be able to come up with some quick routine that I can do every week. If anyone has any suggestions on this, please let me know.
Later that night, we did end up making love. Me on top and as we were doing it, she began spanking me. And I mean spanking me hard. The hardest she's ever smacked me. Ooohhhhhhh, it felt so delicious. I couldn't see, but I'm sure it was red. It was so great and something completely unexpected.
With me still on top, I sat up and spread her legs so I could get to her clit. While fucking her, I used my thumb and finger on her clit and brought her off. I had been really holding back my orgasm, but once she came I was able to let loose after a few more thrusts. We stayed with me inside her for a while, kissing and resting.
You all know that I have that typical male desire to eat the creampie before cumming, but then lose all desire immediately after cumming. But this time, since we had spent some time with me still in her and time had passed, I started to get the feeling again. I moved back up and began raising her legs back, pushing her butt up so that when I pulled out the cum wouldn't all fall out onto the bed. I was about to pull out and dive in, but as I was doing that, she said "oh, no, don't even think about it. I already had a great orgasm, I don't need anymore and it's late. It's time to go to bed." And with that, she moved out from under me, put her underwear on and went to the bathroom. I was soooo close, but was fine with her decision.
As much as I sometimes think that we are not in a WLM because she does not specifically express it, does not use that term, does not implement it more, and even feels guilty or bad when I do all the cleaning or other work for her, the more I think about what happened last night, the more I know we are in her version of a WLM. And I went to bed happy last night. Very very happy.
As part of a background, on Friday I bought a bunch of new pedicure materials. I ordered some great clear makeup cases with locks on them with the intent of putting all of the pedicure tools in one (toe spreaders, buffers, nail edge cutter, cuticle clipper, cuticle pusher, cuticle cleaner, double edge cleaners and scrapers, files, etc.) and all of the polishes in the other. I also bought some new cuticle remover (Blue Cross) and some nifty little single polish holder that is rubber, so you never have to worry about the bottle tipping over. I used her account to order the materials, so I had to tell her to not be worried when she received an email from the company I bought them from. She was happy about the presents. She was happier that my plan was to organize, and of course that the purchases were for her benefit.
She also began telling me how slammed she was with work and other things that day. She also texted me telling me her and her work partner needed to go to a work event on Friday, but afterward they wanted for the four of us (me, my wife, the partner and her husband) to go to dinner.
After that exchange, she also began explaining how a sudden meeting needed to take place and there were going to be problems with pick ups of the kids because she had to go to that meeting. I offered to leave work early to pick up one of the kids from school for her. This relieved a bunch of pressure from her because she would have been worried the entire time she was doing what she needed to do. While she was there, I asked if she wanted me to make reservations for dinner. She enthusiastically stated yes and told me to contact her partner. After my discussions with the partner, I made the reservations per her request.
I then picked up the one kid and she was able to take her time and then go to the other school for a different event with another kid. While there, I texted her if she had anything planned for dinner. Her response: "I wish I did."
Nothing was defrosted or available, so I began rummaging through the house to figure out what to make. I found some tomatoes, mushrooms, and fresh basil, so I knew I could do something. I kept looking and found risotto. With those ingredients, wine, chicken stock, Parmesan cheese, and garlic, I made a wonderful risotto.
If you've ever made risotto you know that you need to be stirring it constantly while slowly adding the stock having it absorbed and repeating until it's ready. You need to immediately serve it once it's ready. So I began to text her asking when she was going to be home so I could time it right. At first, she said she'd be home in 10 minutes so my plan was to keep gently cooking it until she arrived. At 15 minutes later, I asked her eta again and she said she was heading home. That should be at most a 5 min trip, so I stopped cooking, had the table ready and the food served. 5 minutes passed and the kids were starving, so I let them eat. 5 more minutes passed and I didn't want the dinner to be bad for her, so I gently urged her to get home soon.
When she arrived home about 5 more minutes later, we kissed and sat down to dinner. The kids were already on thirds, but the food was still in good shape. As we were eating, we discussed my texts a bit and I explained how I wasn't trying to rush her, just that I wanted the dinner to be good for her. Her response: "You're so cute, getting all upset about the dinner going bad."
Immediately after dinner, she received a phone call for work she had to take, so she went to our office and I cleaned the kitchen. All of the dishes and cleaned the entire area. When she came back down, I was finishing and she said "look at you doing all the cleaning. Sorry that I just came home, ate, then had to take the call and did not help with cleaning up." I explained I totally understood and was happy cooking and cleaning. As I was finishing, she kissed me and said "My little househusband." (which, unfortunately, I'm not. I've told her most recently that I would love to quit my job, stay home and take care of the kids and the house. She knows it would be great too, because she knows I'd be in better shape and she'd always have great dinners ready for her.)
After all the kids were asleep, she looked for the open bottle of wine, but I explained that I had used it to cook. So I went to the fridge and opened the bottle for her. When doing so, I noticed one of our wine opener corkscrews was slightly bent, so I went to my shop and fixed it. This was part of my plan - about a month ago she mentioned that she wanted to make a list of the things that needed to be fixed, but she never did. Over the weekend I totally cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed our room and fixed two things in the house without being asked, which she was extremely happy about. So when I fixed the corkscrew, her response was "wow, look at you. You're on fire."
After pouring her a glass of wine, she said "Do you want to play Scrabble or something tonight? Ah, forget it. I'm totally fried. Maybe I'll just let you do my toes."
Whenever she says those things, I never know how to respond. My feeling is one of joy, wherein I'd like to profusely express to her how I would love to do her toes, but I always get the feeling that when I respond in that manner, it makes her uncomfortable. It's a battle in me. I want to express to her how much I love it so she will want to do it more, but I realize that it will probably have the opposite effect. Therefore, I simply said I would be up for doing her toes, but then noted that only a portion of my recent purchase had arrived. Not everything had arrived. She wanted to have them done, so upstairs we went.
Her toes were a dark color that is popular these days and it took a long time to remove all of the polish. I asked her what she was going to wear on Friday night, but she wasn't sure. It wasn't going to be a bold color though, so I went with a dark red, something I thought could go with any outfit really. The entire time I was working, she was on her phone working, or looking at Facebook, and then reading on the Ipad. We were also talking about other stuff.
I didn't do a great job - I think the color I used was old and it didn't flow on the nails that well. It took a long time. By the time I was done, it was passed our normal bed time.
After the nails dried, she was in the bathroom washing her face while I was cleaning up and she casually said "Now you need to learn to do facials." I immediately got a little excited, but I also not only have no idea how to do a facial, but I expressed to her that if I screwed up on her toes it was not big deal, but I didn't want to ever do something wrong when giving her a facial! She agreed and immediately said she was only kidding. I will have to figure out how to do a home facial. It won't be nearly as good or as complicated as she could get done at a salon, but I should be able to come up with some quick routine that I can do every week. If anyone has any suggestions on this, please let me know.
Later that night, we did end up making love. Me on top and as we were doing it, she began spanking me. And I mean spanking me hard. The hardest she's ever smacked me. Ooohhhhhhh, it felt so delicious. I couldn't see, but I'm sure it was red. It was so great and something completely unexpected.
With me still on top, I sat up and spread her legs so I could get to her clit. While fucking her, I used my thumb and finger on her clit and brought her off. I had been really holding back my orgasm, but once she came I was able to let loose after a few more thrusts. We stayed with me inside her for a while, kissing and resting.
You all know that I have that typical male desire to eat the creampie before cumming, but then lose all desire immediately after cumming. But this time, since we had spent some time with me still in her and time had passed, I started to get the feeling again. I moved back up and began raising her legs back, pushing her butt up so that when I pulled out the cum wouldn't all fall out onto the bed. I was about to pull out and dive in, but as I was doing that, she said "oh, no, don't even think about it. I already had a great orgasm, I don't need anymore and it's late. It's time to go to bed." And with that, she moved out from under me, put her underwear on and went to the bathroom. I was soooo close, but was fine with her decision.
As much as I sometimes think that we are not in a WLM because she does not specifically express it, does not use that term, does not implement it more, and even feels guilty or bad when I do all the cleaning or other work for her, the more I think about what happened last night, the more I know we are in her version of a WLM. And I went to bed happy last night. Very very happy.
Monday, March 11, 2013
Interesting Opportunity
My wife swallows. She always has. It's not something that ever forced on her, or even asked her to do. It's something she's done from the very beginning and that has not ever stopped.
99% of the time we make love, it's in the bedroom. There have been other places in the house, but with kids, unless you really wanted to scar them, you're best off doing it in the bed, with the door closed. A couple of days ago, we ended up in the shower together and after I brought her off nicely with my tongue, she returned the favor.
What was interesting, however, was that as she was getting off of her knees, I noticed that she had spit out a bit of my cum. I don't believe it was all of it, just the last parts, but I was 100% certain that some of it had been spit out.
Which now has me super curious. I'm wondering if she's been swallowing when she didn't really like it. Whether it was just a one time thing (in the morning, in the shower - maybe other circumstances). Maybe my cum didn't taste good that morning.
I have to figure out a way to discuss this with her without offending her, making her feel self conscious or make her feel bad. I'm even wondering if I can turn this around and gently suggest that if she ever feels the need to get rid of it, she only need to kiss me.
99% of the time we make love, it's in the bedroom. There have been other places in the house, but with kids, unless you really wanted to scar them, you're best off doing it in the bed, with the door closed. A couple of days ago, we ended up in the shower together and after I brought her off nicely with my tongue, she returned the favor.
What was interesting, however, was that as she was getting off of her knees, I noticed that she had spit out a bit of my cum. I don't believe it was all of it, just the last parts, but I was 100% certain that some of it had been spit out.
Which now has me super curious. I'm wondering if she's been swallowing when she didn't really like it. Whether it was just a one time thing (in the morning, in the shower - maybe other circumstances). Maybe my cum didn't taste good that morning.
I have to figure out a way to discuss this with her without offending her, making her feel self conscious or make her feel bad. I'm even wondering if I can turn this around and gently suggest that if she ever feels the need to get rid of it, she only need to kiss me.
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Cross-Dressing
Well, not really.
By the time I was done, however, it was dark out, but I still needed to go running. It was cold by this time too, so when I was putting on my running gear, I noticed that I only had a black long sleeve running shirt. My shorts were black too. Running at night on the street wearing all black, with no reflective clothing, is a really bad idea. My solution? I went into her workout clothes drawer and found a running jacket type that was like the picture, only more blue than green, but that same type of bright color. (BTW - that picture is from Lululemon, a place that she shops at endlessly!!!)
When I came downstairs and she saw me, she immediately said "what are you doing?!?!" I explained the situation to her and even explained that it wasn't that girlie, no one would see me and I needed something not black. Her response was "I know, but it's just that it's my jacket." Upon leaving she said "Just don't stop to talk to anyone!"
I know she doesn't love it when I wear women's clothing. I do NOT do it in front of her because I know she doesn't particularly like it. It freaks her out a bit. I also need to be careful because I believe that the cross-dressing thing might be a reason why she does not fully understand the WLM or submissive man concept.
There are many different parts of the spectrum, but a submissive man to a woman absolutely does not have to equal a effeminate man. You can have the manliest male out there, who is also submissive to his woman. I know she's more attracted to the alpha type males, so equating being submissive to her as being effeminate is not going to make her feel comfortable.
I made sure to take the jacket off as soon as I got home and then made the bed, folded her nighttime clothes placing them on the bed with a chocolate mint for her.
Monday, March 4, 2013
She is not Vocal
She is definitely an interesting person. Good things happened to both of us on Friday. So to celebrate a bit, I bought a couple of lobster tails, Mussels, Little Neck clams and Steamer clams, flowers, a bottle of champagne and made a hell of a dinner! Grilled everything up and enjoyed the night. She got her period that day, so she wasn't in the mood that night. Very enjoyable night.
The next night, we went out to a function where we were dressed up. She looked so hot in a great dress, heels and she did her makeup and hair differently. I wasn't the only one who noticed, as many men and women complimented her that night. It was a great event. By the time we got home, it was rather late. Despite being tired, once in bed, we began kissing and I eventually removed her panties. She still had her tampon in, but that didn't stop me. I brought her off and she returned the favor, so to speak.
What I find "funny" about the whole thing is that we're at a point where eating her out on her period doesn't even warrant a mention from her. I mean, it's nothing surprising. Sometimes I fear it's disinterest, but I really think it's more just she doesn't think of these things after they've happened. Even when I've successfully eaten my creampie from her, she never mentions it again. She never requests anything in the bedroom. She never asks for anything in particular or anything.
The next night, we went out to a function where we were dressed up. She looked so hot in a great dress, heels and she did her makeup and hair differently. I wasn't the only one who noticed, as many men and women complimented her that night. It was a great event. By the time we got home, it was rather late. Despite being tired, once in bed, we began kissing and I eventually removed her panties. She still had her tampon in, but that didn't stop me. I brought her off and she returned the favor, so to speak.
What I find "funny" about the whole thing is that we're at a point where eating her out on her period doesn't even warrant a mention from her. I mean, it's nothing surprising. Sometimes I fear it's disinterest, but I really think it's more just she doesn't think of these things after they've happened. Even when I've successfully eaten my creampie from her, she never mentions it again. She never requests anything in the bedroom. She never asks for anything in particular or anything.
Monday, February 25, 2013
Vacation
Back from vacation, which was phenomenal, but not much happened WLM wise. She was extremely happy and relaxed, so that was all good. She got some alone time too.
The one funny WLM episode that did occur was us discussing an event we were going to do the next day. We discussed it for about 10 minutes, evaluating timing, pros/cons etc., and then we needed to head back to the room. She needed to go to the store, so she took off, while I took everyone back to the room.
When she came back, she said "I booked the trip. We're going at 2:00, we're taking the "XXX" tour and we're all set, so no more discussions." Reading typed words cannot give to you a sense of tone or how the two people in the conversation are reacting to each other. As she said that, I was sitting in chair and she was behind me, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing my cheek. My response to her was simply "sounds perfect." And it was.
I know that my most recent posts have been positive ones. I feel it necessary to express that I wish for us to be able to communicate more wherein I could explain my true deepest WLM feelings, she is 100% comfortable with that discussion, she more fully acknowledges our WLM and our WLM becomes more and more integrated into our daily lives. An improvement in those areas I believe would enhance our lives and our WLM. I think we are still moving towards that. Sometimes it appears it has stalled, other times going strong and getting stronger.
The one funny WLM episode that did occur was us discussing an event we were going to do the next day. We discussed it for about 10 minutes, evaluating timing, pros/cons etc., and then we needed to head back to the room. She needed to go to the store, so she took off, while I took everyone back to the room.
When she came back, she said "I booked the trip. We're going at 2:00, we're taking the "XXX" tour and we're all set, so no more discussions." Reading typed words cannot give to you a sense of tone or how the two people in the conversation are reacting to each other. As she said that, I was sitting in chair and she was behind me, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing my cheek. My response to her was simply "sounds perfect." And it was.
I know that my most recent posts have been positive ones. I feel it necessary to express that I wish for us to be able to communicate more wherein I could explain my true deepest WLM feelings, she is 100% comfortable with that discussion, she more fully acknowledges our WLM and our WLM becomes more and more integrated into our daily lives. An improvement in those areas I believe would enhance our lives and our WLM. I think we are still moving towards that. Sometimes it appears it has stalled, other times going strong and getting stronger.
Friday, February 8, 2013
Continuation
In my continued efforts in providing more service, I have stepped up making the bed, folding her pajamas nicely on the bed and added some chocolates this last time. She loved that.
But that's not the coup. No, the coup was I worked extra hard at work to complete various projects to open up some unexpected vacation time. So instead of traditional valentines day presents, I've surprised her with a trip/vacation she's been dying to do for a long time.
I had to tell her earlier than V-Day because she needs to plan for her work and other things, but she was very pleased.
She is also aware that I have been making many efforts to find a new job, which pleases her. I still need to be better at doing other things to make her happy.
But that's not the coup. No, the coup was I worked extra hard at work to complete various projects to open up some unexpected vacation time. So instead of traditional valentines day presents, I've surprised her with a trip/vacation she's been dying to do for a long time.
I had to tell her earlier than V-Day because she needs to plan for her work and other things, but she was very pleased.
She is also aware that I have been making many efforts to find a new job, which pleases her. I still need to be better at doing other things to make her happy.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Wife Led Marriage
Last night, my wife had to go do something that was unpleasant, but something she had to do. (I'm being intentionally vague so as to protect identities.) Concurrently, she was on track to get her period today, so yesterday she had bad cramps and did not feel well.
Hearing that she was suffering from cramps, on the way home I picked up fresh fruit and dark chocolate and prepared it while she was out. This morning, before I left for work, I made the coffee, made a fruit plate and arranged several pieces of chocolate on a plate and put it by her bedside. She was very pleased this morning!
After thanking me through email, I wrote back "you're welcome. I love doing those things for you. Glad it made you happy. Still looking for additional things to do for you."
Her response was decidedly WLM in my humble opinion. Her response (edited to remove the non-related stuff) was: "...As for thinking of other things to do for me... I really want for you to be able to quit your job and do something else you like. I love that you spend time thinking of me and doing things for me but I'd rather you spend the time at this point focusing on getting a new job. Not forever :-) just for a month or two. My happiness will increase exponentially by seeing you walk out the door and go to a job that makes you happy, so that you can spend more time with me and the family."
If there is no humiliation, demand, or order, how can it be a WLM? I have heard the terms Wife Led Marriage, Loving Female Authority or Female Led Relationship before and they all mean the same thing to me. Reading her answer carefully, it is a combination of all three of those short hand monikers for our relationship.
She's expressing the gratitude, the love, but also telling me what to do to make her happy. It all comes down to "what does she want?" What does she want? She wants the chocolate, she wants the toes painted, she wants those things, but she wants the other things too and is telling me it's going to make her happy. So what am I going to do? I'm not going to stop doing the nails, flowers or any of those things, but I'm also going to focus on the new job angle too.
What is still "funny" to me is that she does not realize that this is a WLM. She doesn't focus on it at all. She just does. She is just who she is. And I love her for it.
There have been a lot of posts that have been non-sexual. It's not to say that we aren't having sex. We are. There has been nothing kinky, no tease and denial, no chastity belts etc. None of those things that I've tried to introduce in the past have stuck and I've stopped suggesting them. Again, what's funny is that twice in the last month, after getting into bed and me bringing her off either one or two times with my tongue and/or fingers, she's said "now I'm too tired to reciprocate" and we've just gone to bed with me not having an orgasm.
In both of those times, I'm 100% convinced she's not doing it on purpose, with a conscious decision to deny me an orgasm. She just felt too tired and wanted to go to bed. So what is that? It's a WLM!!!!!! It's exactly how she wants to be! She wanted to go to bed, so she did. Again, I was perfectly happy to have that happen.
Do I crave more? Yes. Would I have wished for the chastity belt? Would I have wished for more playfulness? More teasing? Absolutely. Am I upset or sad that it did not happen? Nope.
Hearing that she was suffering from cramps, on the way home I picked up fresh fruit and dark chocolate and prepared it while she was out. This morning, before I left for work, I made the coffee, made a fruit plate and arranged several pieces of chocolate on a plate and put it by her bedside. She was very pleased this morning!
After thanking me through email, I wrote back "you're welcome. I love doing those things for you. Glad it made you happy. Still looking for additional things to do for you."
Her response was decidedly WLM in my humble opinion. Her response (edited to remove the non-related stuff) was: "...As for thinking of other things to do for me... I really want for you to be able to quit your job and do something else you like. I love that you spend time thinking of me and doing things for me but I'd rather you spend the time at this point focusing on getting a new job. Not forever :-) just for a month or two. My happiness will increase exponentially by seeing you walk out the door and go to a job that makes you happy, so that you can spend more time with me and the family."
If there is no humiliation, demand, or order, how can it be a WLM? I have heard the terms Wife Led Marriage, Loving Female Authority or Female Led Relationship before and they all mean the same thing to me. Reading her answer carefully, it is a combination of all three of those short hand monikers for our relationship.
She's expressing the gratitude, the love, but also telling me what to do to make her happy. It all comes down to "what does she want?" What does she want? She wants the chocolate, she wants the toes painted, she wants those things, but she wants the other things too and is telling me it's going to make her happy. So what am I going to do? I'm not going to stop doing the nails, flowers or any of those things, but I'm also going to focus on the new job angle too.
What is still "funny" to me is that she does not realize that this is a WLM. She doesn't focus on it at all. She just does. She is just who she is. And I love her for it.
There have been a lot of posts that have been non-sexual. It's not to say that we aren't having sex. We are. There has been nothing kinky, no tease and denial, no chastity belts etc. None of those things that I've tried to introduce in the past have stuck and I've stopped suggesting them. Again, what's funny is that twice in the last month, after getting into bed and me bringing her off either one or two times with my tongue and/or fingers, she's said "now I'm too tired to reciprocate" and we've just gone to bed with me not having an orgasm.
In both of those times, I'm 100% convinced she's not doing it on purpose, with a conscious decision to deny me an orgasm. She just felt too tired and wanted to go to bed. So what is that? It's a WLM!!!!!! It's exactly how she wants to be! She wanted to go to bed, so she did. Again, I was perfectly happy to have that happen.
Do I crave more? Yes. Would I have wished for the chastity belt? Would I have wished for more playfulness? More teasing? Absolutely. Am I upset or sad that it did not happen? Nope.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Flower
More "boring", undeniably non-kinky stuff, but stuff she's loving more and more.
I did her toes on Tuesday night. Just completely causal, both of us on the bed, watching tv, while I worked on making them nice. They came out okay. Not as good as I hoped. The polish actually looked nice, but what I have not mastered yet is all of the other work that needs to be done to the toes to get them looking ready for the polish. I did cut the nails in an effort to make them nice and round and smooth, but they were different lengths. One pinkie toe nail was much smaller than the other one. The other thing I didn't do well was pay attention to the cuticles. I didn't remove any, lotion it or anything else. So while the polish looked nice, with no smudges or missteps, the toes could have been better.
But, she mentioned many times on Wednesday that she was very happy with her toes and was happy whenever she saw them. So that was great.
While at work yesterday, I decided to get a single rose for her and the plan was to, either while she was still sleeping (many times, she's still asleep before I leave for work) I would put the rose on the bed with a little love note. I had the rose and the note ready and she was actually up and working by the time I left this a.m. While she was down stairs working, I quickly made the bed, folded her pajamas, and put the note and flower on the bed in the middle.
Got a text from her saying how much she loved it and it made her week! In an effort to be playful, I teased her a bit, texting back "what, no more comments about making the bed and the pajamas? Getting stale already?" Her response was "NO! Don't stop doing that. I love it."
I'm going to start integrating making the coffee in the morning for her. I've tried to do that in the past, but she's kind of persnickety on how she likes her coffee. I need to figure out how to make it the same way she likes it.
I did her toes on Tuesday night. Just completely causal, both of us on the bed, watching tv, while I worked on making them nice. They came out okay. Not as good as I hoped. The polish actually looked nice, but what I have not mastered yet is all of the other work that needs to be done to the toes to get them looking ready for the polish. I did cut the nails in an effort to make them nice and round and smooth, but they were different lengths. One pinkie toe nail was much smaller than the other one. The other thing I didn't do well was pay attention to the cuticles. I didn't remove any, lotion it or anything else. So while the polish looked nice, with no smudges or missteps, the toes could have been better.
But, she mentioned many times on Wednesday that she was very happy with her toes and was happy whenever she saw them. So that was great.
While at work yesterday, I decided to get a single rose for her and the plan was to, either while she was still sleeping (many times, she's still asleep before I leave for work) I would put the rose on the bed with a little love note. I had the rose and the note ready and she was actually up and working by the time I left this a.m. While she was down stairs working, I quickly made the bed, folded her pajamas, and put the note and flower on the bed in the middle.
Got a text from her saying how much she loved it and it made her week! In an effort to be playful, I teased her a bit, texting back "what, no more comments about making the bed and the pajamas? Getting stale already?" Her response was "NO! Don't stop doing that. I love it."
I'm going to start integrating making the coffee in the morning for her. I've tried to do that in the past, but she's kind of persnickety on how she likes her coffee. I need to figure out how to make it the same way she likes it.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Ahhhhh, that wonderful feeling
It is the little things. I've mentioned the toenails before and how it isn't that important to her. She likes it, but nothing special. She had a pedicure from a salon a long long time ago and about 2 weeks ago it was wearing off. She made a comment about how I'd have to do her toes for her soon. It was a passing comment and nothing further was said about it.
Two days ago, she mentioned that I'd have to do her toes again. I had made up my mind when she told me, that I would I would do her toes the first chance I got. We couldn't do it that night, nor could we do it last night. She did say last night "I took the polish off my toes today, but you're going to have to cut them and paint them tomorrow. I'm not going to ask, you're just going to do it." It was said in her happy, matter of fact, normal, voice. I was feeling great, because without probably fully understanding everything, I do feel like she IS understanding the relationship, the power, our roles, and what makes us both happy.
It got even better though. I've continued my habit of, as soon as I arrive home, making the bed and folding her pajamas on her side of the bed. Last night, as we were getting in bed, she said that while she knows she's said it before, having the bed made and her pajamas folded is just such a nice thing, it makes her so happy, that she can't imagine it not happening in the future. She said she hopes it never ends. I told her that her reaction is the exact reason I do it for her.
It's getting better and better. And now I've got to start thinking of more ways to keep this up for her.
Two days ago, she mentioned that I'd have to do her toes again. I had made up my mind when she told me, that I would I would do her toes the first chance I got. We couldn't do it that night, nor could we do it last night. She did say last night "I took the polish off my toes today, but you're going to have to cut them and paint them tomorrow. I'm not going to ask, you're just going to do it." It was said in her happy, matter of fact, normal, voice. I was feeling great, because without probably fully understanding everything, I do feel like she IS understanding the relationship, the power, our roles, and what makes us both happy.
It got even better though. I've continued my habit of, as soon as I arrive home, making the bed and folding her pajamas on her side of the bed. Last night, as we were getting in bed, she said that while she knows she's said it before, having the bed made and her pajamas folded is just such a nice thing, it makes her so happy, that she can't imagine it not happening in the future. She said she hopes it never ends. I told her that her reaction is the exact reason I do it for her.
It's getting better and better. And now I've got to start thinking of more ways to keep this up for her.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Update
I have been gone for way too long. My wife and I are still very much in love. But I'm sure more people (if they still exist) are interested in the WLM aspect, as opposed to whether we are still in "love."
First, there is an explanation for why I've been absent from the blog. That explanation is that I found that I was spending wayyyyyyyyyy too much time thinking about the WLM concept, which was making me focus on the male centric, pornographic, fantasy desires as opposed to focusing on her. My thoughts were being clouded by the desire for the CB-6000, creampie eating, being spanked etc., instead of focusing on our actual, real relationship.
I began coming home from work so desirous for a hardcore WLM that when she did not perform anything in the sexual arena, from her own desire, I became sullen and resentful. Most of the time, this was not communicated to her, but that almost made it worse. If there are any actual women out there who are reading this blog because they are searching for information on the subject after their husbands/boyfriends expressed an interest, they are probably nodding their heads knowingly.
What I realized was that I needed to focus more on just us having fun together and taking the WLM aspect in stride, whenever it did occur. I had tried to get her interested in "demanding" a massage from me, making me pamper her by painting her toenails or something similar. I have to realize, however, that while I may enjoy those things, it is obviously not important to her. If it's not important to her, then why should I continually force the subject? It seemed as if when I did the toenails, she would enjoy it in the moment, but then I was always left to wonder whether she was enjoying it solely because she knew I enjoyed it?!??! It was a vicious circle.
Instead, I realized that I should take the opportunities whenever they arose. I offer to do things for her and/or just do things I know she will like. For example - many times when I come home from work, her pajamas are on the tub in the master bathroom. Many times, I would leave them there, or put them in the hamper. Since she wears them multiple nights in a row, I now take them and fold them nicely and put them on bed. She has certainly noticed and commented several times on how nice that is (she even said it's like being at a really nice restaurant when you get up to go to the bathroom and you come back and your napkin is nicely folded again on your chair.)
My point is that my focus now is on her and specifically things I know she likes. I fix everything in the house. I have made sure to do the home improvements I know she wants, but has not asked me to do. That's the thing. She doesn't ask or demand. Nor does she want to. She would never feel comfortable demanding that I paint her nails.
That doesn't mean we aren't in a WLM. I'm much more focused on her and her needs and wants. She truly appreciates everything. It's actually kind of funny, because from her point of view, if I ever do approach her on a more "traditional" WLM, I think her answer would be "I have it great right now. Why should I change it? The only thing I'd end up doing more of is sexual things you like and I don't particularly enjoy."
She doesn't want to feed me my own cum. She doesn't like dildos or vibrators. She enjoys G spot orgasms (though I can't get her to squirt), so I recently purchased a G-Spot vibrator. I used it on her a couple of nights ago and she was not impressed. She stated that she would much rather have me inside her, instead of some plastic. She's said that before. So I won't be using the vibrator on her anymore. It also means that she'll never want to put me in chastity cage and make me fuck her with a strap-on.
Don't get me wrong. I wish we were more simpatico on those sexual activities. It is somewhat disappointing that she is not interested. On the other hand, I do get great satisfaction, and so does she, when I do things that help her and make her happy. Making coffee for her in the a.m. so that she has it ready before she leaves. Emailing dinner ideas and recipes. Going shopping for her. Doing the dishes after work. Do P90X with her because that's what she wants to do.
Probably not the most interesting post but I think I'm living more of a WLM now than I had previously thought, despite the lack of femdom sexual activity. And I believe that we are both happy.
First, there is an explanation for why I've been absent from the blog. That explanation is that I found that I was spending wayyyyyyyyyy too much time thinking about the WLM concept, which was making me focus on the male centric, pornographic, fantasy desires as opposed to focusing on her. My thoughts were being clouded by the desire for the CB-6000, creampie eating, being spanked etc., instead of focusing on our actual, real relationship.
I began coming home from work so desirous for a hardcore WLM that when she did not perform anything in the sexual arena, from her own desire, I became sullen and resentful. Most of the time, this was not communicated to her, but that almost made it worse. If there are any actual women out there who are reading this blog because they are searching for information on the subject after their husbands/boyfriends expressed an interest, they are probably nodding their heads knowingly.
What I realized was that I needed to focus more on just us having fun together and taking the WLM aspect in stride, whenever it did occur. I had tried to get her interested in "demanding" a massage from me, making me pamper her by painting her toenails or something similar. I have to realize, however, that while I may enjoy those things, it is obviously not important to her. If it's not important to her, then why should I continually force the subject? It seemed as if when I did the toenails, she would enjoy it in the moment, but then I was always left to wonder whether she was enjoying it solely because she knew I enjoyed it?!??! It was a vicious circle.
Instead, I realized that I should take the opportunities whenever they arose. I offer to do things for her and/or just do things I know she will like. For example - many times when I come home from work, her pajamas are on the tub in the master bathroom. Many times, I would leave them there, or put them in the hamper. Since she wears them multiple nights in a row, I now take them and fold them nicely and put them on bed. She has certainly noticed and commented several times on how nice that is (she even said it's like being at a really nice restaurant when you get up to go to the bathroom and you come back and your napkin is nicely folded again on your chair.)
My point is that my focus now is on her and specifically things I know she likes. I fix everything in the house. I have made sure to do the home improvements I know she wants, but has not asked me to do. That's the thing. She doesn't ask or demand. Nor does she want to. She would never feel comfortable demanding that I paint her nails.
That doesn't mean we aren't in a WLM. I'm much more focused on her and her needs and wants. She truly appreciates everything. It's actually kind of funny, because from her point of view, if I ever do approach her on a more "traditional" WLM, I think her answer would be "I have it great right now. Why should I change it? The only thing I'd end up doing more of is sexual things you like and I don't particularly enjoy."
She doesn't want to feed me my own cum. She doesn't like dildos or vibrators. She enjoys G spot orgasms (though I can't get her to squirt), so I recently purchased a G-Spot vibrator. I used it on her a couple of nights ago and she was not impressed. She stated that she would much rather have me inside her, instead of some plastic. She's said that before. So I won't be using the vibrator on her anymore. It also means that she'll never want to put me in chastity cage and make me fuck her with a strap-on.
Don't get me wrong. I wish we were more simpatico on those sexual activities. It is somewhat disappointing that she is not interested. On the other hand, I do get great satisfaction, and so does she, when I do things that help her and make her happy. Making coffee for her in the a.m. so that she has it ready before she leaves. Emailing dinner ideas and recipes. Going shopping for her. Doing the dishes after work. Do P90X with her because that's what she wants to do.
Probably not the most interesting post but I think I'm living more of a WLM now than I had previously thought, despite the lack of femdom sexual activity. And I believe that we are both happy.
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