I couldn't agree more!

This is the perfect comment to this picture.

Book and a Redhead

Can't pass up the opportunity to re-post a hot Redhead reading a phenomenal book. If you've never read it, you have to read this book. Yes, the Kubrick movie was very good too, but the book is an experience onto itself.



re-posted from: http://fuckyeahgeekgirls.com/post/4577857426

Monthly Visitor

It's my wife's time of the month and like many women, she does not feel well. PMS definitely occurs. She and I were discussing it last night and she was recognizing she was being "bitchy." Of course, I told her last night it didn't bother me and I understood what was going on.

So, I'm looking to my readers to provide some suggestions on something I could "go through" once a month when she was also going through it. I'm not looking for something "sexual" - I'm thinking more of either a service type thing (massage or something) or something I have to "suffer" through.

I do not want to suggest me being locked in the device, because I don't want to only associate that with her not feeling well!

Any suggestions would be appreciated!

I didn't have the balls yesterday to tell her it was Femdom Day, but as she was leaving the house to do some errands, she mentioned that she wanted to sit down with me later and come up with a meal plan for the week. As soon as she left, I downloaded a weekly meal planner from http://www.theprojectgirl.com/. (BTW - that is a great site for ideas) I planned the entire week with not only the meals, but also recipes. I prepared the shopping list too. When she returned, I presented it to her and asked her to add anything to shopping list so I could that for her. She was very impressed!! Made me feel very good.

Wrapping up the Chastity Experiment

A lot of additional things that are blog worthy happened after the last post (which occurred in May) and today that I will ultimately report. However, after the cage came off, it never went back on, so I can summarize where we are with the chastity idea.

It was a great experience for me. I loved it. I would willingly go back in if she ever asked. And I'd go back in for however long she wanted. This probably does not come as a shock to anyone reading this blog.

The more pertinent question, of course, is what does she want! My interpretation of our discussions about the device, my interpretation on how she enforces the "non-device" chastity, and my interpretation of how she dealt with me being in the device leads me to believe that a chastity device is something that may occur in the future. This is why I've previously said that while I'm no longer in the device and since it was taken off she's never attempted to put it back on, I was still optimistic about the future.

I believe she enjoyed playing with me while I was in the device. She wasn't faking anything. Her texts indicated a playful side. Even the teasing, she enjoys. On the other hand, I know that she was not pleased with the lack of cleanliness. That's a turn-off for her.

The overriding issue is that she does not focus on, or think about, kink unless prompted. Meaning, I can't ever really imagine her coming up to me one night, completely unprompted, and stating: "here is the cb-6000. Put it on. You're mine."

That's a specific example. As a more generalized idea, I do not believe that she's ever going to be driven to do anything kink related on her own. The only things she'll ever do will occur after being prompted by a discussion.

Now, we haven't fully fixed our issues that occurred in May. Only time will fix those. So, even after all of that, and after all we've been through these last couple of months, we are still not fully into a chastity lifestyle. We are practicing male chastity in a way because I'm not supposed to masturbate unless given permission, and not supposed to cum unless given permission. But even under those "rules" she makes me cum - and only every once in a while denies me because she wants.

Will she be receptive if I asked her to put me back into the device? I think she would say yes, absolutely. But therein lies the rub. I would have to ask. Then again, being put in because I ask is fine with me and it's a step in the right direction. In order to make it more pleasurable for her, though, I would suggest that she let me out every morning to take a shower, clean everything, and then be put back in for the day.

Sure, that would "ruin" some of the fun, but still, the device is more of a play thing anyway. I mean, if I really wanted to get out of the device, or do something to make myself cum while in the device, I could accomplish that.

The Next Couple of Days

After she returned from her vacation, we were returning to our normal lives. Well, except for me, because I had the device on for days she was on vacation, and now for a couple of days when she returned.

I guess I should explain a little bit about how I was feeling during this time. I was feeling very good, both in my own situation and in my situation with her. It was difficult to not text her about us and steer the discussion about the chastity device. I wanted to talk about the situation 24/7 just because it was so much on my mind. Realizing that approach would not work, it was a struggle.

Given that, I was a little bummed that she did not bring up the situation very often. We briefly discussed, but that was mostly right after she returned. There was not any major discussion by her asking me about the device, how she felt about it, felt about me wearing it, or how I felt about wearing it.

I was being ridiculous in retrospect, though, because the one night was phenomenal! Sitting there on pins and needles waiting to see what happened the next was being selfish on my part.

Two funny things happened after that night. First, in my effort to talk about the device but also not go crazy talking about the device, I decided to text her something funny/innocuous. I ended up texting her, saying that having to sit to pee everytime was different and kind of a pain in the ass. Her response did not surprise me, it was typical of my wife, and I truly loved it. She texted back "Funny about you having to sit. Kinda like that. Means you think of me everytime." And that is one of the reasons I love her so much. Her response was 100% right - I did think of her everytime I had to sit. She also didn't send it in the "porn dom" way, she wasn't playing a script, or saying it because that's what she thought I wanted to hear. Her response was natural. It is who she is.

The episode happened while I was at work. The thing is that once we have those exchanges, she has me thinking about her all the time and I just want to keep texting with her. That would be a bad decision on my part, so I'm always having to hold back.

Anyway, by the time I got home I was all worked up. Shocking, I konw, but still. The second thing that was funny was we were just hanging out and she casually mentioned that she couldn't remember where she had left the keys to the device. Now, this was not said in the sexy, teasing, I'm screwing with you sort of way. This was said in the very typical way my wife loses things! She also didn't mean it in the "I'm pretending that you'll be locked forever" way because she knew were one of the keys were, just not what she did with the second one. That type of interaction is fun and part of what I had hoped would come out of utilizing the device. It also led me to believe that she was enjoying the situation.

Ultimately, that night I was finally let out. She didn't make any big fanfare about letting me out. She simply went and got the key and opened it up. It was fantastic from my point of view just watching her open it and take the device off.

The problem I had mentioned earlier was that despite trying to clean it every day in the shower, I wasn't ever able to get it completely cleaned because I couldn't touch it (of course), so when she took it off, she wasn't entirely happy with the state of cleanliness. I know that turned her off a bit. She did end up teasing me for a bit and then using her hands, brought me off. It was very very satisfying. Though as any man who is interested in chastity, I would be have been happier had she brought me just to the edge, then stopped, then put me back into the device!

After bringing me off, I did reciprocate and then immediately wondered whether she would put me into the cage.

She did not. And since that time, she has never mentioned using it again.

But, if you jump to a conclusion as to why it hasn't been used again, you'd be wrong because to this day, I don't fully know the answer to that question.

The reason being, very soon right after that night, there was a death in the family, we had weddings we had to go to, we both got sick, and then there was also the other issue with her that we had to resolve.

You can imagine that the death put stress into the dynamic that didn't put us in the mood. The weddings also added stress, being sick too. But even with those, our other issue was bigger, in my mind, because it dealt with "us." Sounds weird to say, but I'm not going to explain that specific issue, but will say it is something that we are both committed to working on together and it's getting fixed. (No, she didn't cheat on me, if that's what some have asked.) I've also said that it's not the type of thing that can be fixed immediately, so time will be necessary.

All of that doesn't get us up to the current date. There were some other things that happened that are blog worthy that are upcoming.

When she got home from her trip

I appreciate all of the comments, encouragements and insight! As always, it is helpful to hear what others think/observe.

Remember - all of these events occurred back in May, so I already know the ultimate outcome of everything and I am not currently locked up and we've never used the device since that one time. That's the bummer part. But, I'm actually still optimistic about the future.

So, after the trip, I was definitely bummed that during the entire time she was gone on the trip, she never mentioned the device or anything related to that. Not even a question about how I was doing in it. I truly felt like it was the classic "ignore and denial" as opposed to "tease and denial."

But, by the time she was returning, the text exchanges occurred that were very nice. It was those text exchanges (that took all of about 1 minute to write) that I would have loved while she was gone. It's something I've tried to explain to her before - that the whole "tease & denial" thing or chastity in and of itself is not some hugely invasive, all encompassing, major endeavor. Instead, while in chastity, a couple little comments here and there would go a very very long way.

Anyway, the day she returned was a bust, but only because she was very tired, and we had a bunch of stuff to do with the kids and the house. By the time everything was done, we talked about her trip and caught up, but there was nothing sexual really going to happen. Of course, I was disappointed, but not really. I understood the situation.

Parenthetically, that same night we ended up talking about something that would end up being a major problem within our marriage. I'm being vague on purpose. Let's just say that night was the beginning of something that we've had to have major discussions since and we continue to struggle with it. It's the main reason I stopped blogging for a while, and it's definitely something that was a reason why any type of kink/chastity etc., went away.

But I digress. Back the situation at that time. The next night, we actually did talk about the device. She did say that while on the trip she had been thinking about me and specifically me in the device, it was just that she didn't feel comfortable texting around other people or something. Not entirely sure I believed her when she said that. Vulnerability breeds doubt, I think.

Anyway, we were happy to see each other and spend time together and things progressed nicely. We eventually started kissing and getting intimate. I felt different than before, because I was extremely curious to see where things would go. How would she react? Would she touch it? Would she even deal with it at all?

The questions were answered, because she eagerly went down there, rubbed, and licked, and played with it - which was unbelievable to me. Seriously. I never really thought she'd do that. Meaning, even if she accepted the whole concept because it was something I wanted to do, I never thought she'd be comfortable with "playing" with it. I never thought she'd embrace it being there.

Then, she blew my mind even further. While down there, she made comments like "you know what, I think I'll leave you in it longer." And after a while, she said "that's enough teasing for you. Maybe you'll get more tomorrow. Maybe not."

I could not believe it. It was phenomenal. I sort of went nuts on her. I went to town on her and brought her off on two incredible O's with my tongue! After that, I was so amped up, I blurted out that I'd love to give up all my orgasms if I could give her those kinds of orgasms and her response surprised me. She laughed and said "I'd gladly give up all your orgasms for those orgasms."

I was sky high. It was wonderful. Everything was going very well, and we had some great days immediately thereafter, but eventually, things fell apart.

Hiatus is Over - Chastity Worked!!!! (Sort of)

I missed writing. A million things happened from my last post to the ones that will follow.

Ultimately, the explanation for my absence is due to a) death in the family; b) two marriages in the family; c) work (of course) and d) some crazy good and crazy bad stuff with my wife.

Details of the events are worthy reading and will be forthcoming, but they will be only focused on the interactions between my wife and I.

Giving a shortcut of the results of everything that has happened from May to the present, we've gone from engaging in the use of a chastity device (YES!!! FINALLY!!!! She was much more receptive that I had ever imagined) to having marital problems and then to now. Now, we are both on the same ground, both committed to each other, both in love with each other..........but with residual issues that prevent me from proclaiming complete happiness in the marriage. That last sentence doesn't mean to imply that we are unhappy in the marriage, just that time will be required before we are back where we were before.

The following, then, has already happened. I'll try to describe the things that were going through my mind when they occurred, but the results and issues have already occurred. So, while reading, I guess the spoiler is that other than the first time, we have not used the device since. In that respect, it didn't work. On the other hand, as you'll read below, it did work.

I had been desiring to get to use a chastity device for a long time. The self imposed chastity was o.k., but it didn't bring an outward interest from her, which is often the case. (I actually agree with Susan's Pet, mostly, on the types of reactions women will have and my situation is a common one, I expect.)

I knew that if I explained what a chastity device was, or tried showing it to her on the internet, that would be a turn off for her. It's the weirdness of it that would bring out a natural aversion reaction. Therefore, I purchased a CB-6000 (got it cheap) and figured it would be a good starter/play piece. I never expected it to be a 24/7 thing.

I purchased it well in advance of her taking a girls trip out of town. My plan was to present it to her before she left, locking me in it while she was out of town. I'm sure that anyone who is actually interested in my blog understands the attractiveness, from the male point of view, of that situation.

Once it arrived, I actually wore it to work several days, without her knowledge. I figured I had better know what it feels like and if I could handle it before I presented it to her. This was done in stealth. She never knew. I'd put it on at work and then take it off before coming home.

This was an incredible turn on, even though I could remove it at any time. It definitely fueled the fantasy. It was very good thing that I used the device before presenting it to her, because it did take many different experiments with the spacers and ring to find the size that wasn't too restrictive that it hurt too badly, but also not loose enough where I could pull it out.

The erections were definetely painfull........but for me, it was a delicious pain. Loved feeling locked. I enjoyed having it locked away. My time in it by myself was such a turn on for me, that I couldn't wait to see if she would actually like it.

I kept wanting to show her or tell her, but kept chickening out. I've done kinky stuff with her before, but I really feared I was going way out on the ledge with this one. There were nights that I had promised myself to bring it up and the mood was not right, so I didn't.

Push came to shove, however, on the night before she left. It was "now or never." She was going to be gone for more than 4 days, so we did spend a lot of time together that night. Finally, as we were getting ready to go to bed, I took the plunge.

I told her that it was going to be a tough time with her gone, because I'd miss her, but also because usually when she left like that, I'd masturbate while she was gone. She immediately said "you can masturbate." In my own head, that was a bad thing and didn't "bode" well for my planned major step, because it indicated to me that she didn't embrace the "denial" idea.

Then I told her I bought something and her reaction was similar to previous things. She got sort of an incredulous "what the heck is he going to spring on me now?" look. She never gets upset, grossed out necessarily, or whatever, it's just that she has no idea what major, new, odd, interesting thing is going to happen. So when I told her I bought something, I'm sure she was thinking it was some sort of sex toy for me to use on her or something.

We went upstairs and I told her I wanted to wear a chastity device while she was gone and I showed it to her. She didn't understand it or embrace it. Even looking it, she had no idea what I was talking about. She was laughing (not in a mocking way) and still listening though, so that was a good thing! She was not freaked out, so I figured this was going much better than I had thought it would!

I ended up having to show her how it worked (not actually putting it on yet)and telling her what it was and what it would do, and what I couldn't do with it on. Again, she kept just shaking her head, but in a good way. She took it remarkably well - which was a positive sign to me that she's getting very comfortable with the craziness I embrace. That old saying "It's only kinky the first time" really is true. The more you talk, the more you, the more normal it becomes.

As I was trying to explain the idea of what it did, she did say the normal reaction things like "does it hurt", "I'd never want anything like that on me," "I can't believe you'd want that," and "I have no idea why you'd want that." These didn't bother me, because I never envisioned or thought she'd immediately understand and grasp the concept immediately. She never did show revulsion to me and was even funny, because she apologized to my penis, saying that she "wasn't doing this to you" etc.

When I was explaining stuff to her, and gave her key, she would say things like "what happens if they see this little key, am I supposed to tell them its because my husbands cock is locked up" which immediately sent my cock straigt up. I didn't have it on yet, and kept telling her to stop saying stuff like that. She was laughing at this situation, finding it amusing.

I know this sounds odd, but while she was very accepting, not grossed out, and was laughing about it, I could also tell that she didn't really understand it and she was definitely not turned on about it. And by that, I mean she wasn't excited about it from her point of view.

I did put it on and she spent time checking it out. We engaged in other playful banter and that that night she did play with it a little, with me in it, but nothing special. No verbal statements about it, no further discussion about it and nothing special. I did end up bringing her off (when I was in the device), and that was a more turn on for me. I was straining it, big time, and it was tight tight tight. It was super hot for me.

But, afterward, she went to sleep and she didn't even mention anything about it. That's what made me think that she wasn't really that turned on by the situation.

She left the next morning, not mentioning it, and never mentioned it the entire weekend. We communicated a lot over the weekend, texts here and there, about stuff she was doing, I was doing, other stuff. It was very fun. But.....she never mentioned it once.

It was a long time she was gone. I didn't want to be the one to bring it up, instead waiting for her. It was disappointing that it was never mentioned.

For my own response to being in it for that long of time - it was great. I enjoyed it. It also hurt and I couldn't clean it well. No matter what I did to clean it with soap and water in the shower, I couldn't scrub everything in there, and then I couldn't dry it, so I could tell it wasn't getting clean. As a 24/7 thing, I knew it would never work. I would have to be let out each morning to clean/dry, then put back in for the rest of the day.

It also hurt around the skin around the testicles. It didn't hurt otherwise, but sitting down, there was as stretching/rubbing that was not good. I could sit certain ways to lessen that, which I did and helped. As a sexual turn-on, however, it was off the charts great. I loved it.

On the day she was coming home, but while she was still there, she did text "Are you ready for 'freedom' tonight. :)" It was the first mention and I immediately got hard. I couldn't figure out what to text in response. I didn't want to go overly excited, but wanted to convey to her that the text was something I craved and hoped she liked. I ended up responding "I'd love freedom. I'd love you doing whatever you want to do. But I'd also love you teasing and denying me - making me stay in longer. Thanks for the text too. Had an immediate 'impact' on me. :)"

Sadly, she never responded that text!

I'll update what happened when she got home later.